Harry Potty and the Deathly Boring

Harry Potty and the Deathly Boring
by Stefan Petrucha and Rick Parker (illus.)

Harry Potty and is friends Don Measley and Whiny Stranger are up against He-Whose-Prices-Can’t-Be-Beat, Valuemart.  They have to find his Horbucks and destroy them in order to kill him.  After a quick recap of the first 6 movies, Harry goes off to Nosewarts to do battle with the Odor Eaters and face his destiny.

With the release of the last Harry Potter movie, I’ve immersed myself in Potter geekdom.  Now I’m one for a good Harry Potter spoof, but this is nothing like a good Harry Potter spoof.  Everything is a stretch in this graphic novel, and it’s so overdone that it’s just not funny.  I found it for the most part to be unremarkable and uninteresting.  There were a few spots that I found humorous (for example, Snape’s potions class has become Frappe’s barista class), but overall I was disappointed.

For an excellent Potter spoof (and if you have two hours to watch it), check out StarKid’s A Very Potter Musical.

Image taken from http://www.amazon.com.

Also, happy birthday, Librarianista’s mom!

God Went to Beauty School

God Went to Beauty School
by Cynthia Rylant

Chocolate comforts with a friend: tall no whip black and white mocha.

If God came to visit the earth, what would He do while He was here?  Would He learn how to do a perm?  Would He get a dog?  Would He be a good storyteller?  Would He watch TV?  What’s His favorite animal?  Would He make friends?  In this collection, Rylant explores the personality of God in ways that only the honest verses of poetry can express.

I would love to do an exegesis on every one of the poems in this short collection.  You can read the entire thing in 20 minutes, and I suggest you do it.  While not overtly adhering to any particular faith or scripture in her descriptions and depictions of God, I think that she shows truths about Him that only artists know how to do.  She takes a look at the belief that we are created in God’s image in a whole new light–it shows how God is like us. We like to hang out with friends, make dinner, take care of pets, stand up for something we believe in because God likes to do it. In this character study of God, being made in His image is not a standard to live up to; it shows where we get our humanity from.

I cannot be impartial in this review.  I believe in God, the God of the Old and New Testaments and in His Son, Jesus.  I believe in the God that is pure love above all else.  Because of that, it has colored the way I read Rylant’s book.  And whether or not you agree with me on these things or not, I challenge you to read this book and not be moved by His divine heart as it is written by Rylant… or as you read it through whatever lens you have.

Image taken from http://www.amazon.com

Knuffle Bunny Free

Knuffle Bunny Free: An Unexpected Diversion
by Mo Willems

Breakfast = tall black and white mocha + blueberry streusel muffin

Trixie is growing up, but Knuffle Bunny is still a big part of her life.  This time he is going with her and her family to visit her grandparents in Holland.  But once they’re at Oma and Opa’s house, Trixie. Realized. Something.  She left Knuffle Bunny on the plane!  She’s terribly sad at first.  But then… she realizes it’ll be okay.  She has her family and lots of fun things to do.  Maybe she doesn’t need Knuffle Bunny any more?  Is Trixie growing up?

I wonder if Mo Willems realized the Knuffle Bunny books were going to be a trilogy…  In any case, at first I thought this book was going to be just like Knuffle Bunny.  It seemed like the same story.  But it isn’t.  It’s a lovely story about growing up.  I don’t even have kids of my own and I got choked up at the ending.  Additionally, Willems’ pictorial composition in the Knuffle Bunny books is just great. The cartoons over the black and white photos perfectly depicts these stories.

Image taken from http://www.amazon.com

The First Part Last

The First Part Last
by Angela Johnson

Had time to enjoy a tall, four raw sugar, cinnamon on top latte before work this morning.

On Bobby’s 16th birthday, he gets the surprise of his life.  His girlfriend, Nia, hands him a red balloon, and tells him she has some news.  They’re pregnant.  Johnson’s second book in the Heaven series takes a look at teen pregnancy from the male point of view.  Chapters alternate between past and present, the time leading up to Feather’s birth, and Bobby’s life with his new little girl.  Bobby wrestles with the decisions he’s made and the ones he has to make to do what’s best for his new family.

This book presents a very interesting point of view.  I’ll admit that teen fatherhood is not something I think about, although I see teen mothers all the time.  Bobby is completely in love with his little girl, and I utterly respect him for the choices he makes.  I had a tough time reading this book, though, because of the language in which it was written.  It seemed choppy.  That may have reflected what was going on in Bobby’s mind (who wouldn’t be a little messed up with this situation?), but it made it hard to follow in some parts.

Image taken from http://www.amazon.com.

If I Stay

If I Stay
by Gayle Forman

Stopped by the old watering hole today for iced grande sweetened green tea and a smile from a friend

Mia was expecting a snow day.  She was expecting a great day with her family.  She wasn’t expecting the swerving truck.  She wasn’t expecting to have to choose. Now as she’s watching her life unfold around her without her participation, she wonders if she can do it.  Can she live without her parents and without her brother?  Can she leave her grandparents and her best friends?  As she wanders around the hospital, reminiscing about her past, she wonders what she’s always wondered: where does she fit in?

I want to say I’m haunted by the beauty of this book, but that might have negative connotations.  It’s like listening to a sad, beautiful song. Forman’s descriptive abilities when it comes to the way that music makes you feel is phenomenal.  Music is such a big part of this story, the book is almost like a piece of music.  It’s fitting that Mia, the main character, is a cellist.  The cello has a low, somber sound that can elicit images of beauty and of tragedy, making you weep and smile at the same time.  That’s the best way I can describe how I felt about this book.  The way the story changes from present to past is like a seamless change in movements.  I almost didn’t read this book because of the grave subject matter, but I’m so, so glad I did.

Image taken from http://www.amazon.com.

Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians

Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians
by Brandon Sanderson

Drinks you should try once, but not get often because of the monumental amount of calories: heavy whipping cream coffee Frappuccino.  So bad for you, but so delicious.

Alcatraz Smedry has been passed from foster home to foster home for thirteen years.  No one keeps him long because he has an uncanny knack for breaking things: doors, kitchens, a chicken, etc.  On his thirteenth birthday, he receives a package from his father: his inheritance.  His inheritance happens to be a bag of sand.  The next day, a crazy old man claiming to be his grandfather (who has the uncanny knack for being late all the time), takes Alcatraz away, trying to explain to him the importance of the sand, that he’s actually part of a noble family in the Free Lands, and that the world as he knows it is ruled by evil librarians.  And since possibly the most important sand has been stolen by the librarians, they have to infiltrate the downtown library (the largest library in the tri-state area) to get them back before they are forged into dangerous lenses.  Along with Alcatraz are Sing Sing (just Sing for short), a massive anthropologist specializing Hushlander weapons, Quentin, another Smedry whose Talent is babbling, and Bastille, the Smedry’s knight.  Having learned about all of these things in a few mere hours, Alcatraz now faces dinosaurs, monsters made of paperback romances, and possibly being sacrificed on an altar of outdated encyclopedias for a family that he never knew existed and he thought had abandoned him.

This series was recommended to me by a dear friend and classmate, Julie.  And oh my gosh!  Any author who can reference Plato and Monty Python in a kids book, name all his heroes after prisons, and make arriving late into a very good thing gets an A+ in my book.  And it’s a book about librarians – that doesn’t happen too often.  Before reading this book, I had no idea what I was getting into.  Now I know that I’m part of a conspiracy to keep the Hushlands under control by controlling the flow of information.  I’m kind of excited about it, actually.  Thanks for revealing that about my duty and my destiny, Sanderson.  Too bad everyone in the Hushlands will think your book is fictional!  Mwahahaha!!

Sorry about that little outbreak, kids.  When you read the book, you’ll get the jokes.  This is a great book.  I think it would be great for any reluctant reader, anyone who appreciates quality humor, or anyone who has had a history with librarians, positive or negative.

Image taken from http://www.amazon.com.

Jessica’s Guide to Dating on the Dark Side

Jessica’s Guide to Dating on the Dark Side
by Beth Fantaskey

Stopped in to see an old friend, left with: iced grande 5 pump classic, 2% Starbucks doubleshot.

Meet Jessica: senior, mathlete, 4H member, adopted.  This year is shaping up to be a great year, and she’s caught the eye of one of the nicest, most attractive guys in the school.  But things get pretty strange pretty quickly.  There’s a new foreign exchange student, Lucius – tall, dark, and devastatingly handsome – who also claims that he’s a vampire prince, and that Jessica, actually Anastasia, is a vampire princess and they have been betrothed since birth in order to unite their vampire kingdoms and establish peace.  I know, right?  A little difficult to believe.  Jessica refuses to believe it for quite some time, even though her parents invite Lucius to actually stay with them (they are vegan anthropologists who studied this “underground culture” in Romania when Jessica was a baby – vampires).  Anyway, Lucius tries to court Jessica who outright refuses to marry him or believe in vampires.  But after awhile, she starts believing some of the things he says, believing in herself to be a beautiful queen capable of wielding extreme power.  Of course at that time, Lucius decides that he likes American independence and freedom of choice, and chooses to disregard the family pact and do what makes him feel good, which includes going out with a skinny blond cheerleader who is not his betrothed.  This doesn’t sit too well with the family back home in Romania.  Now that Jessica is starting to accept her past,  her family, (and maybe even starting to love Lucius?), she has to muster up more power than she ever thought possible to preserve not only her future, but possibly the world’s.

I’m sorry for that long summary, but this 350 page book packs in A LOT.  A lot that I couldn’t put down.  I should really know better than to start a book at 9:30 PM… but I was done before 2 AM.  At first I didn’t like the book, mostly because of Jessica’s best friend.  She got on my nerves really quickly.  But as soon as Fantaskey started developing Lucius’ character, I wanted to know absolutely everything about him and I couldn’t put the book down.  I’ll admit, I swooned.  There’s this absolutely sophisticated, attractive, powerful young man showing this insecure young woman that she is powerful, captivating, and stunning (women should have curves, should have a presence, not be sticks – I like the way this guy thinks!) and all around making her feel like a princess, like she deserves better than the best of what life has to offer; and as a young woman, I can’t help but be drawn into that.  Lucius’ demeanor and manner of speech reminded me of Cary Grant in The Philadelphia Story.  Perfectly captivating.  Until the end, when Jessica was the one who was really in power.  This is not what I would call a light read.  There are some parts that make you uncomfortable and some parts that might make most people blush.  But it is definitely a good story.

Image taken from http://www.amazon.com

The 39 Clues: Storm Warning

The 39 Clues: Storm Warning
by Linda Sue Park

Shared this morning: a big box of Verona to help get through class!  Just remember to call ahead if you need a box of joe to go!

Warning!  Here be spoilers!

Amy, Dan, and Nellie are getting so close to completing the hunt!  They know that they have to follow Anne Bonny, a legendary female pirate who sailed with Calico Jack.  It’s a toss up between Jamaica and the Bahamas.  Dan wants to go to the Bahamas because of the most excellent water slides available.  Amy wants to go to Jamaica because that’s where Anne Bonny actually spent time as a pirate.  They end up going to both, and it’s a good thing they did.  They acquire pieces that they need to solve a puzzle that involves the history of Jamaica, the Most Excellent Nanny, and Lester, an archivist whose dedication to help is incredible, even though he knows nothing about the clue hunt.  The kids discover some truth about their au pair, who is growing more suspicious all the time, and also how Grace has orchestrated almost everything up to this point way beyond what they knew.  Finally, the kids are starting to get some answers, but at a very, very dear cost.

Storm Warning sets everything thing up for the final book, and I am highly anticipating its release.  I can almost see exactly how it’s going to happen, but the authors are very good at constructing twists that some might and some might not expect.  Park’s leg of the story is filled with an incredible energy and emotion.  Some of the emotions I’d rather not have felt, but there were also moments during this book that I felt an incredible elation for the Cahills’ victories and I was glad that the kids caught a couple of breaks and are finally learning more and more about the big picture.  Madeline would be proud.

P.S. Don’t forget that the 39 Clues experience is available online!  Find my card!  P2P7HHHNXP

Image taken from http://www.amazon.com

Ten Things Your Barista Would Love For You To Know

I’m taking a hint from this article I read about hairstylists.  We baristas feel your pain.

I’m going to divert a bit from my regular posts tonight and focus more on the “ista” part of my life as opposed to the “librarian” side.  This post is going to be mostly about coffee shop and drive-thru etiquette.  These are things we would never say to your face, but it would be really, really awesome if customers could take a hint and help us out with a few things.

This is going to be a rant post.  But all of my rantings stem from actual interactions I have had while working as a barista in a Starbucks drive-thru store.

Ten Things Your Barista Would Love for You to Know (but is too polite to say anything!):

• Hang up your cell phone! This is a big one. Whether you’re coming into the store or going through the drive thru, it is absolutely one of the rudest things to do to be on your cell phone when you place your order.  We are here to wait on you, not for you.  If you pull/walk up on your cell phone and we do our jobs by asking you what we can make for, and you ask us to wait while you’re having a conversation with someone else, that is entirely unacceptable.  You came up to us – if you’re not ready to give us your full attention like we intend to do for you, then please step aside.
• Look at us.  We won’t turn you to stone if you look at us in the eye, I promise.  We are not coffee dispensers.  We are people.  When you’re handing us your money or credit card or when we’re handing you a drink, don’t just stare off into space.  Acknowledge us.  You would be upset if we didn’t acknowledge you.  We are not any different.
• Listen to what we have to say. If I ask you how you’re doing today and you respond with “I want…” or “Give me…” that speaks volumes.  While we might not have the most important things to say all the time, we are trying to brighten your day and make your experience with us as pleasurable as possible.  It would be nice if you’d do the same for us.  Also, when did “please” leave the contemporary English conversational vocabulary?
• We are not idiots because we work at a coffee shop or in a drive-thru. We are college and graduate students.  We have degrees in all areas of study.  We have families to support, mortgages and bills to pay.  We work multiple jobs.  The job might not entail mentally taxing work, but it is hard to be on your feet for 8+ hours and still be smiling at the end of it.  Do not treat us like we are beneath you.  You don’t know us or our stories.
• Don’t get grumpy. We are doing the best that we can.  If there are drinks ahead of yours, you have to wait.  If you have a complex drink, it’s going to take longer than someone who gets an iced chai.  We know what we are doing, and we’re not ignoring you.  If you want something instantaneously, go to a gas station.  We handcraft every beverage, and quality takes a certain amount of time.
• Don’t complain about prices. There’s nothing we can do about it.  Prices are set by the company, not us.  If you don’t want to pay what they’re asking, then don’t come.  I’m not going to give you a discount, free extra shots, extra flavors, etc. no matter how kindly you ask.  Especially if you ask.  Or worse, merely tell us that you want extras for free.  Occasionally we do like to “surprise and delight” you with extras on the house.  But don’t come expecting them.  That is pretentious and rude.
• Take care of your children. This to me seems like a no-brainer.  I guess not.  If your kids (or you, for that matter) order something and we make it for them, and it’s not what they wanted, it’s not our fault.  We can’t read minds.  We will be more than willing to remedy the situation, but we will be grumpy about it if you are.  We will take it much more lightly if you don’t blame us, apologize, and especially tip!  Also, clean up after your kids.  A table covered in crumbs and spilled drinks is disrespectful to us and to our stuff.  Would you let your kids get away with those kinds of messes at home?  And don’t stand them up on the counters.  People put their food and drink there.  That’s just unsanitary.
• Notice the store’s hours.   If you’re getting ready to leave for work in 5 minutes and your boss dumps a project in your lap that s/he needs within the next half hour, you would be very upset.  Please, don’t come to the store two minutes before closing time (or five minutes afterward) and expect us to be happy about it.  Especially if you’re ordering Frappuccinos or smoothies.  Those are our least favorite drinks to make because of how time-consuming they are to make.  No one needs 600 calories that badly that it can’t wait until the next day.
• Tip your baristas. Not on principle.  If you had a bad experience because of us, you shouldn’t tip.  But if your baristas are nice, quick, and your drink tastes the way it should, tip them.  They do hard work for little pay.  It’s nice to be acknowledged every once in awhile.
• Don’t hover. You like your drink the way you like it.  We understand.  Baristas have some of the pickiest drinks known to man.  But if you’ve told us what you wanted, we will make it.  Hovering makes new kids nervous (and they have enough stress!).  Hovering makes veterans feel disrespected because they know how to do their jobs, and they don’t need you to tell them how to do it.  Also, don’t ask us to put ourselves in harm’s way for your drink.  For goodness’ sake, it’s just coffee.  I once had a customer ask me to steam her drink to 210 degrees.  That is dangerous.  Steaming milk past 200 degrees not only causes it to curdle, but it could explode in our faces and all over our hands causing serious burns.  It’s just not worth it.

There’s a lot more.  But I think I’ve dried your eyes out enough.  But I hope you’ve learned something in the process.  One fellow I work with has told me that  he believes everyone should have to work a low-paying customer service job for at least one year so that they learn what it’s like on the other side of consumerism.  I highly support that.  This job in particular has forever changed the way I not only go through drive-thrus, but treat all people.

Image taken from BloggingStocks.com

Spells

Spells
by Emily Gravett

A make-it-your-own Frappuccino by Alex: tall vanilla syrup nonfat light whip coffee Frappuccino.  Probably wouldn’t get it again.  Not a fan of Fraps.

Spells is about a frog who finds an old book that’s been torn to pieces.  But this isn’t just any book – it’s a magic book.  The frog wants to be a handsome prince so that he can have his princess and live happily ever after.  But the spells are all jumbled, and he just can’t seem to get it quite right.  In the end, he thinks he gets what he wants, but it turns out to be not all it’s “croaked” up to be.

I apologize for that terrible pun.  Can you blame, me though?  Anyway, I did not really care for this book.  Actually, I read it weeks ago, returned it, started a post about it, and never finished it because I just didn’t care that much.  There was very little substance to the story.  There was a cool idea behind it with the mix-and-match animal parts from the jumbled spells, but it become a complete CHORE to see all of the combinations.  If you were reading this book to a group, you could have a lot of fun with it because you could limit the amount of combinations you did, and coming up with activities would be a breeze.  However, if you were are home reading this to a small child, chances are that child will want you to read EVERY SINGLE combination.  And then they’d want you to read it again because the loved it so much the first 16 times (or they are delaying bed time).  You’d find yourself ripping out certain pieces of this book just to make it go by more quickly.

Image taken from http://www.amazon.com